The Six Happiness Tools

Friday, June 11, 2010

We all want to be happy, but most of us are trapped by ways of
thinking and behaving that seem to keep us perpetually dissatisfied.

But there are six simple tools that will help us to be truly, deeply
happy. Find out what they are, right here:

1.) Appreciation.
This is the first and most fundamental happiness tool. Appreciation
is the purest, strongest form of love. It is the outward-bound kind
of love that asks for nothing and gives everything. Research now
shows that it is physiologically impossible to be in a state of
appreciation and a state of fear at the same time. Thus,
appreciation is the antidote to fear.

2.) Choice.
Choice is the father of freedom and the voice of the heart.
Having no choices, or options, feels like being in jail. It leads to
depression, anxiety, and the condition called learned helplessness.
Choice can even govern perception. Anyone can choose the course of
their lives, but only happy people do it.

3.) Personal power.
This is the almost indefinable proactive force, similar to character,
that gives you power over your feelings and power over your fate.
Personal power has two components: taking responsibility and taking
action. It means realizing that your life belongs to you and you
alone, and then doing something about it. Personal power keeps you
from being a victim.

4.) Leading with your strengths.
When you give in to the automatic fear reaction, it makes you focus
on your weaknesses, which only reinforces your fear. But when you
take the path of the intellect and spirit, you naturally begin to
focus on your strengths-and start to solve your situation. People
often think that fixing their weaknesses will save them, but it
rarely works. It's just too painful. Leading with your strengths
feels good, and that's why it works. Simple but true.

5.) The power of language and stories.
We don't describe the world we see-we see the world we describe.
Language, as the single most fundamental force of the human
intellect, has the power to alter perception. We think in words, and
these words have the power to limit us or to set us free; they can
frighten us or evoke our courage. Similarly, the stories we tell
ourselves about our own lives eventually become our lives. We can
tell healthy stories or horror stories. The choice is ours.

6.) Multidimensional living.
There are three primary components of life: relationships, health,
and purpose (which is usually work). Many people, though, put all
their energy into just one area. The most common choice is work,
because work best assuages our survival fears of not having enough
and not being enough. Other people become obsessed with
relationships ( because relationship is another word for love ), and
some people limit their lives in the name of longevity. None of this
works. Happiness comes from a full life.

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